I need a vacation.

I had a nice chat with my research advisor today about my research plans for the next few weeks. In addition to trying to get more data and training the biochemistry student who'll be my successor on the project, I'll be teaching an REU student about research. Oh, and I haven't finished the work I need to have for TFA institute. It's going to be a busy few weeks.

My research advisor seemed pleased but somewhat surprised that I'm going to be hanging around the lab. He told me, "I'll completely understand if you want to spend a week on a beach somewhere instead." Alas, that just isn't what I do. Since starting college, I've traveled a lot, but I've been on just one trip that didn't have some purpose beyond visiting people, and that was a Christmas vacation spent sleeping on an air mattress on my aunt's floor.

I think I need to commit to saving for a fun trip in the next twelve months. It doesn't have to be extravagant, but it absolutely must not involve working in a molecular biology lab forty hours a week, touring nanotech start-ups, interviewing for a job, presenting a poster, or attending a funeral. This may not be the most prudent possible use of my money, but it may be key to maintaining my sanity.

Trying not to be a pain in the neck.

My little brother has his very first job, working part-time as a cook at the pizzeria where my mom is assistant manager. After his half-hearted efforts to find a job last summer failed, we were all a bit worried, but he's getting good reviews from my mom's coworkers so far so it looks like he'll do well and gain experience that will help when he applies for other jobs.

He'll be doing that soon because he's decided to defer his scholarships and take next year off from school. He spent the first two years teetering on the brink of losing his biggest scholarship by not maintaining a 3.25 gpa, and he still has no concrete plan for a major so a year working in the real world may provide some much needed perspective. However, not having a scholarship that pays his living expenses means he needs to find enough work to pay rent. He may find a cheaper place by rooming with a friend, but he's pretty adamant about not living with our parents. (After a mere week at home, I completely understand.)

Even though my brother and I have very different approaches when it comes to money, he's managed to avoid the major mistakes that snare so many college students. He has no debt and a bit of savings. My brother does grasp the importance of accumulating money, and if he can just keep his impulse to buy every new tech toy reasonably well in check, he might end up in ok financial shape.

I'm trying to figure out how to offer a bit of guidance without annoying him. Lecturing or nagging would be counterproductive, but we've always been very open about money so it's fairly natural to mention, "Hey, I opened a Roth today. Now that you're earning income you can start one yourself if you have a little money you're able to set aside for retirement. Here's a pretty good option you can start with $50 a month that you might want to consider."

Would it be reasonable to give him a personal finance book as well? I don't want to force advice down his throat, but I do want to give him resources and encouragement to make good decisions that will make his life easier later on. I like The Only Investment Guide You'll Ever Need, but it might not appeal to my brother. Do you have any recommendations for a good book for a twenty year old starting out?

Patience is a virtue.

C'mon Vanguard. I know it takes time to transfer money from checking, but I keep looking at my account and discovering that my transaction is still "Pending". If I can't have my shares now, can the market please dip a bit so my $5,000 will buy more of them? Thanks.

I've got to quit listening to the naysayer.

I will open a Roth IRA today. It's going to happen, and then I'll stop worrying about it. Not discussing this sort of thing with my mother ever again is going to be key to managing to actually quit fretting.

I have good parents, but they have dramatically different parenting philosophies. My father, who was in favor of a much more authoritarian approach when we were younger, has actually become more laid back now that my brother and I are in college. He has concluded that we're adults who get to make our own decisions, even if they aren't always the choices he would have made. He's willing to offer guidance if asked, but he doesn't force his views on anyone.

My mother is only too willing to offer unsolicited advice, and her knee-jerk reaction to any situation is almost always pessimistic. I've inherited that trait, but over the past few years I've learned to figure out what the worst case scenario is, do what I can to prepare for it, and then try to move on. Mom, on the other hand, tends to let fear of making a bad decision keep her from making any changes whatsoever.

She's a worrier. When we talked about I Bonds, she didn't think they were safe because the U.S. government might default on its debts. Her faith in the FDIC is nonexistent so she assumes she and my dad could lose their life savings in a bank failure. Theoretically, I guess she's right, but if the government falls apart to that degree, we've got bigger problems than just money.

Naturally, she has concerns about my plan to open a Roth IRA. She suggested that Teach for America might kick me out and then I wouldn't have earned income. (I worry about that too, but I'm doing my prep work and will go to institute determined to learn as much as I can about teaching so that I can best help my students. What more should I do?) It doesn't seem likely that I'll be unemployed for months and months. I'm pretty sure that I can find a job doing something, even if it's tutoring part time and waiting tables part time.

My mother is also convinced that the U.S. stock market is going to crash so she thinks I'm insane for putting money into a fund that includes stocks. There are going to be recessions, but this is money I'm investing for use forty years from now. That gives me a lot of time to ride out downturns and makes inflation that much more of a concern. I know a well-diversified portfolio of both stocks and bonds is the sensible choice, but my mother does a great job of making me second-guess my decisions.

Secret handshakes and overpriced jewelry.

Invitations to join academic honorary societies always struck me as somewhat more annoying than flattering. Many of them seem to exist merely to give college students another activity to put on their resumes in exchange for a modest fee. Needless to say, I didn't join a lot of honorary societies.

Yet, Friday afternoon I found myself signing a membership roll and trying not to giggle while learning a very strange secret handshake. What was different this time? Maybe it was because I'd actually heard of the organization before; because my dad's older sister was initiated decades earlier; because the chapter president is an ancient theorist from the physics department and the chapter secretary is one of my favorite English professors and associate dean of the honors college; or because the note inviting me to join included the proviso that the honors college would pay the lifetime membership fee if I could not afford it, making this a slightly less money grubbing operation. Maybe I just wavered and let my vanity get the best of me.

I'll have to swing by the honors college office to pay the membership fee on Monday. After accepting the invitation and resigning myself to wasting $55, I was informed that I could request reimbursement from my scholarship funds so membership in this organization will cost me nothing. That's very budget friendly indeed.

There's one little problem: I'm now tempted to spend the money on something even more pointless. Members of this honorary organization are allowed to wear a lovely little trinket. Given that I don't have a pocket watch that needs winding, it would serve no useful purpose, but I covet it nonetheless. A reprieve from wasting money one thing doesn't mean I ought to waste it on something else, and wearing the dang thing would probably get me labeled a pretentious twit. Still, I keep thinking about how for a mere $38 I could have the official watch key and a chain to wear it on shipped to me. Please remind me that I don't need any more shiny things or ego enhancers.

I am a child of privilege.

My parents are far too generous. Their intentions were wonderful, but I really wish they hadn't given me this graduation gift. My dad said that he has always wanted to help me get a good start on saving for retirement so they gave me enough to fully fund a Roth for the first year. However, they both have made it abundantly clear that the money is mine to do with as I wish, whether it be investing, putting toward a replacement when my car dies, saving for a house, or going on a really great vacation. Never before has money made me this uncomfortable.

They insist that it's what they wanted to do with their money, and I know it isn't a strain on their budget. This is very clearly a one-time thing. It's a large sum of money, but it is probably a bit less significant to a fifty-something engineer than to a twenty one year old teacher. Still, I would have been much happier if they had kept their money.

Although I appreciate my parents' kindness and desire to improve my life, it still feels strange to benefit from the savings and hard work of others. My mother told me that they were able to give me this gift because they didn't have to pay anything for my college education, but it isn't as though I had to wait tables thirty hours a week to pay tuition. Dead rich people I've never met and the taxpayers of my state financed the past four years, and I wouldn't have been in a position to get the scholarships I did if it hadn't been for the myriad advantages my parents gave me by raising me in a house full of books, volunteering in my elementary school classrooms, and serving as wonderful role models.

It should be up to me to put those advantages to good use and make my way in the world. Working and saving on my own is, as I see it, a big part of adulthood. That's why I already set aside money of my own for funding a Roth. However, there doesn't seem to be any graceful and polite way to decline this gift; I've tried. It looks like I'll either have to find a way to use this money or stick it in savings and pretend it doesn't exist until the opportunity arises to repay my parents' generosity.

The end is in sight, and it scares me.

I have one more final exam before I graduate. Even if I don't show up, my grade is high enough that I'll get a B in the class and complete my requirements. That should make me happy, right? Why does it feel like graduating means I move on to a new stage of my life with even more ways to fail and let down everyone I care about?