Friday, January 18, 2008

The jig is up!

A few days ago I was at home, typing away on my parents' computer. My mom asked, "Whom are you typing to?" I told her, "No one," but she wouldn't take that as an answer. Rather than be pestered about it for the the rest of the evening, I went ahead and told her I was writing on my blog.

Big mistake. She's now determined to find my blog, and she's enlisted my brother in the search. He's been aware that I have a pf blog but doesn't know the title. Fortunately, I haven't posted enough identifying details to be easily googleable by someone who knows about my real life but not the blog, but I'm assuming that if she's determined enough, it's just a matter of time.

She correctly points out that I post this where millions of people can read it. (I'm very grateful for the dozen or so of you who do actually read Not Living on Ramen once in a while.) However, I really don't want her reading it. She's never been great at accepting that her children should be allowed privacy; I'm still disappointed by her decision to read my journal when I was in junior high. This is hardly in the same category; my blog does not contain all of my darkest secrets. Nonetheless, I really don't think that this is her business.

How do you handle these situations? Do you avoid mentioning your blog to others? Do you tell your friends and family all about it, including how to go read it? Do your family members know you blog but respect your desire to keep your blog somewhat private and anonymous? Should I give in to my mother's demands, quit blogging entirely, or just become much more diligent about clearing my browsing history?


Mrs. Micah said...

Clear your cache a lot! At least your blog is pretty anonymous.

When I told my mom, I was somewhat dismayed that she told a bunch of our relatives. I barely kept it out of the Christmas letter. So I'd think hard before telling her.

SJean said...

I live alone, so it is pretty easy to keep private! I don't mention it at all to anyone.

However, in high school, i had an online diary (ok, I still do, whatever) and my little sister would constantly hack in and read it. My parents, never really.

I wouldn't tell her, but since she knows you have one.... hmm

Good luck!

plonkee said...

Eventually she'll get tired of looking.

My family know that I write about personal finance, but I don't tell them the name of my site. If they find it, they are bound to 'out' me - even if unintentionally. And I don't want that.

That One Caveman said...

Fortunately, I've avoided posting too many personally-identifying items so far. But what's funny is that my wife found the blog and instantly knew it was mine! That was funny when I came home from work and found her sitting at the computer, reading the post I made over lunch. Apparently, she's far more clever on the computer than I gave her credit for. At least my parents won't go looking since they rarely boot their computer, let alone surf and search.

Anonymous said...

When I first started my blog, I told everyone who would listen but then I noticed that it was affecting my writing style and I couldnt vent properly.
Now, I avoid telling anyone who is close to me so I can write freely!
Hopefully, your mom will give up, who needs the extra judgment?

SadOatcakes said...

When I first started blogging, I only told my boyfriend. Then my brothers figured it out, and they eventually outed it to my parents.

Bleh. I'd rather none of them read it ... it's not so bad, but I wouldn't choose it.

Data Babble said...

I know what you mean about not wanting your family to read your pf blog. It's much easier telling your story to strangers. I often find myself holding back a bit, because I know my family may be reading it! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Non of my very close freinds or family know about my PF blog. They know I blog for work (my office has a blog) and I have a blog for my hobby.

My PF blog is my secret and my secret alone. My family would freak if they read it, they don't discuss money. Hopefully, she will get tired and not pursue this. Some parents never learn boundaries.

DogAteMyFinances said...

I haven't told anyone. My fiance told someone I run a blog of some type. I quickly deflected that it was for work, and that was that.

If someone I knew found out who I was, I would probably delete the whole thing fast.

Meredith said...

I just found your blog (don't worry, I'm not related.)

The funny thing is that I've been blogging for 3+ years, with a pretty good readership, and my mother STILL doesn't know what I'm doing online.

Or, if she knows, she's not telling.

It makes for awkward moments when she sees me at the keyboard.